Wednesday, May 26, 2010

The way I see it...

My wife reminded me of something today.

I see things differently than other people. I am addicted to my work - no obsessed with it. I have spent my entire adult life perfecting my craft and not letting anything get in the way. Well almost anything.

I have a temper that frustrates me, and get enraged when people don't understand what I am trying to articulate. I got so angry a year ago, I went to great lengths to get my contract voided with my former employer - I hated them that much, I irrationally put my career on the line to leave in the middle of the season.

I have a hard time concentrating on a specific task that is not related to work (and even at work, my A.D.D. kicks in and my focus shifts).

My mother used to say "I hope you have a son just like you."

Turns out - I have two.

And that makes me wonder....Am I on the spectrum too? Could it be because of me that my two boys struggle in school, are obsessed with specific tasks and get angry easily? Is it because of me that they make irrational decisions and do things that at the time make sense to them, but in the end make no sense at all?

After talking about it, my wife and I decided that I would see a doctor and be tested. Maybe through this discovery, I will be a better husband and father, a better more engaged manager and employee and be able to help and understand my two boys better.

When my boys do things that people would label as strange, I think "I remember doing that." So it's possible I am taking this journey with them. That I understand more than I thought I did and that they have a little more in common with Dad than they had hoped.

What a journey this is. Just when I think I have learned something that will help them, it helps me. This will help us unlock some answers, and truly know if Autism is genetic, rather than a problem with immunizations.

I promise to write the story about Spencer and his unique way of discovering things, and I promise to be more consistent with my posts. I look forward to updating you with the doctors findings.

Cory Howerton
Father of two amazing boys on the autism spectrum

2 comments:

  1. Well I look forward to more posts. Hope all is going OK with the move. Thank you for your honesty in your post. I often think that I have similarities to our sons "oddities". And thats probably not the right word and maybe considered offensive to some but maybe you get what I mean when I say oddities. Anyway, We had introduced a brushing technique (that it's the correct name for it through it's much longer and I can't remember) that is part of an added sensory input in our sons day. It really has worked for him at bedtime to settle down and sleep through the night. What I realized through doing this is that I also would do the same thing to myself when I was a kid. I had to brush the air on my arms and brush to my finger tips and it calmed me down. Just one example but there are many that I can relate too. Not sure if I would consider myself on the scale but it does make me appreciate the fact that I believe that there are oddities in everyone that can relate to individuals on the spectrum if willing to admit it. Good for you to do something about it for yourself and for your family. Hey the good news in this is look how far you've come, I don't know you, but to have a family a job, make a big move, you're doing something right, this could be your boys too. Good luck. Everyday living with Autism in your family not only makes you a better parent but a better person. Keep up the good effort.

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  2. Hoping that you and your family are settling well. Looking forward to more posts.

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