Thursday, May 13, 2010

Transitions

We're moving.

Change is not good.

As we prepare to take our boys out of their schools and a place where they get fantastic services, I think a lot about how this is going to affect them short term.

About ten months ago, I left a job I hated to start my own company, and recently on a referral from one of my clients, I was offered an opportunity to pursue a dream - so I took it.

We are moving to a real city, with larger buildings, and things to do. A city with major league teams and summer activities that are not centered around corn.

I firmly believe that the boys are going to love the move, once we get there and get settled. I know that when they start school again next year, while it will be different, they will do fine. Making friends is always hard, but doing so when you are autistic is going to be a challenge - but as with everything else we do, we will get through it.

These boys are hard. Being a parent of one autistic son is difficult enough, but two is un-real.

FIRST DAYS
When I speak to groups of autistic parents, especially those who have just found out that their child is on the autism spectrum, we talk about the "first day."

Your life changes when you get the diagnosis. In essence, it starts over. The first day is the hardest, and while it seems like it doesn't get any easier, it will. At least in most cases.

I meet people all the time that are having a difficult time with their autistic child. Sometimes the behavior is so out of control that parents need help from doctors, local agencies or other resources that are available - including medication.

Remember that you are their voice - you are their advocate - you are the person that loves them. Fight for them, and when you are tired - fight some more. Call the doctors a hundred times, and never give up. They are counting on you and if they will ever have a chance to be independent as an adult, you must fight for them now.

They analyze everything in a different way. We will never fully understand the challenges they face each day. But we must be strong, even in difficult times, and it will be difficult.

Some people will shun you. You might lose some friends. Nothing changes the fact that you are a great parent, with an amazing gift of a child. Never lose sight of that.

NEXT: Interesting interpretations of a young autistic child.

1 comment:

  1. Good luck with your relocation. Congrats on following your dream! This post is timely as we are approaching our first IEP and recently the anniversary of our "first day". It is good to be reminded that we are not being pushy when we advocate for our children, we are simply pushing for what they can not them self say. Thank you for your postings.

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